He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
