Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize