I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Randomize