Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
