But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
