Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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