my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
