Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Randomize
