Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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