I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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