I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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