I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
