yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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