Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Your topless pictures make me question reality
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
