the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
