Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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