You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Randomize
