Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
