gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize