So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
