return my video game
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
