Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
