I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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