5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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