I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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