Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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