so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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