Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Randomize
