Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
My life is pants optional.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
