Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
