AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
