Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
