Whod you bang
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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