At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize
