Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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