Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
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