You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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