she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
