Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
