hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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