shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize