I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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