I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
