You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
