The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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