we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
