It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
