I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
