dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
