I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize